Dan Andrews speaks with good friend “Santa” on best practices for a COVID-Normal Christmas for Victorians.
“I’m pleased to announce that after extensive discussion between the Department of Health and the Department of Elf, Chief Elf Officer Sutton has agreed to permit my friend Santa entry to Victoria this Christmas.
Mr Claus and nine reindeer have skipped all the necessary tests and checks and will not undergo detention in my hotel quarantine prison system, as he has agreed to follow strict instructions to only deliver presents to very good Victorian children whose parents voted for Labor.
Mr Claus agreed that the only thing he and his team will be spreading this Christmas is fines, rules & regulations – and a bit of propaganda too.
And he confirmed that for the first time in our state’s history, every Victorian child whose parents vow to vote for me at the next election will make it onto the nice list this year.” ~ DA (Satire Folks)